Come ON, guys. Let's face it, we are not a family of long-standing traditions. We need to preserve what we have!
I am happy to report that the grand Waffle Conference Extravaganza lives on as the East Coast Edition, aka Wafflepalooza! Below, I share the latest edition of my Wafflepalooza Invite - A literary masterpiece that has gained widespread fan following that is even larger than that of the event itself.
I will also extend a challenge to my younger siblings, ESPECIALLY the BOYS.....DON"T LET THE WAFFLES DIE!!! ..... keep the Syrupy Flame Alive! If not for yourselves, then do it for posterity! (hey, why not invite some cute girls!?!?! )
---------- Forwarded message ----------
Subject: New Prophet, Same Waffles, Probably Same Syrup
Yes, Kids, 2008 has been a year of change. But, let us remember that somethings are constant still: Every morning, the sun will rise. Every evening, the beltway traffic will jam. And every conference, the WAFFLES WILL RETURN!
So dust off your food-storaged specialty syrup, sharpen your shiniest waffle fork, and join us for the groundbreaking Semi-Annual Waffle Conference Extravaganza! - East Coast Edition of the Monseyringdorf Era!
Yes, that's right, Kids, it's time for Wafflepalooza 7™ in all its whipped cream-topped, syrup-bathed, butter-coated, berry-drenched awesomeness.
WHAT? Really? Seriously? You don't KNOW? Well, for those who prefer not to wikipedia after the equinox and/or have heretofore abstained by choice or by circumstance from one of the EIGHTEEN previous events, Wafflepalooza™ is, quite simply, a breakfast in the grand waffle tradition generously garnished with the spiritual feast that is General Conference, Sunday Morning Session.
Now, let's be clear, this is no stream-on-your-laptop-or-squirm-on-a-cold-metal-chair-in-the-dimly-lit-back-row-of-the-stake-center, conference-going experience. This is the whole SLC Posse and Choral Accompaniments LIVE on multiple simulcast, surround sound screens including the Rockville House Jumbotron deep in the heart of the basement of awesomeness....with WAFFLES!
WHEN: Sunday, April 6th; 11am-ish to 2pm-ish
WHERE: The Rockville House (818 Crothers Lane, Rockville)
WHO: You, your friends, your roommates, your significant others, those odd little furry lemmings who always seem to follow you home from the metro every other Thursday unless it's the week before a national holiday, your neighbor's third cousin's body shop guy who gave you that sweet discount on the bling-encrusted grill you've been itching to incorporate into your after-market upgrades to "Mitch the Mighty [Geo] Metro," etc., etc., etc.
ATTIRE: Well, preferably some type of semi-full-coverage clothing, but feel no obligation to strangle yourself with a tie or pour your little booty into those control-top pantyhose unless the masochism helps you focus on the talks. You might consider something such as THIS as an appropriately festive alternative to your standard Sunday fashions.
WE PROVIDE: All-You-Can-Eat WAFFLES, Maple Syrup and Butter
YOU BRING: Supplemental Sustenance of the Sunrise Selection ...Options include but are not limited to eggs (can be cooked upon arrival), stuff to put in eggs (cheese, veggies, etc), sausage/bacon/ham, quiche, non-maple-syrup waffle toppings (fruit, ice cream, carmel sauce, whipped cream, hot fudge, maraschino cherries, etc.), juice, milk, fruit, crepes, etc.
DON'T BRING: Maple Syrup. See, the thing is, The Rockville House was actually built right on top of an ancient maple burial ground. As the mystical powers of the ancient maple tree spirits percolated through the layers of magic fairy dust liberally applied to the structural foundations of the house, the sugary, maple matter liquefied, creating an ever-flowing spring of syrup. Thus, offerings of maple syrup will simply be redundant offerings lacking in any appreciable increase to the culinary experience of those in attendance. Plus, infusion of non magical maple substances could potential anger the maple gods, and we all know what doom that could commence....Seriously, just bring orange juice or goosebury syrup or that semi-freezer burned bag of hash browns you've been meaning to get rid of since your last roommate got married 6 years ago and moved out.
METRO RIDES? by request and pre-registration only. Please contact the Waffle e-Hotline by hitting the "reply" button associated with this message.
DISCLAIMER: If you are in any way shape or form offended at any level by the irreverence of any statement included in this literary masterpiece, well, you probably aren't very much fun. So, you may not want to attend this event, and you will definitely want to make sure you never sit anywhere remotely close to being within earshot of its author or any member of the WCE board of directors during any sort of substantive and/or spiritual experience whatsoever.
Waffle Conference Extravaganza and Waffle Conference Extravaganza — East Coast Edition dba Wafflepalooza and the Wafflepalooza brand are registered trademarks and subsidiaries of the Waffle Conference National Network. This event is produced in conjunction with the 19th Semi-Annual Waffle Conference Extravaganza sponsored by the GonzoGroup Corporation headquartered in Springville, UT.
Subject: New Prophet, Same Waffles, Probably Same Syrup
Yes, Kids, 2008 has been a year of change. But, let us remember that somethings are constant still: Every morning, the sun will rise. Every evening, the beltway traffic will jam. And every conference, the WAFFLES WILL RETURN!
So dust off your food-storaged specialty syrup, sharpen your shiniest waffle fork, and join us for the groundbreaking Semi-Annual Waffle Conference Extravaganza! - East Coast Edition of the Monseyringdorf Era!
Yes, that's right, Kids, it's time for Wafflepalooza 7™ in all its whipped cream-topped, syrup-bathed, butter-coated, berry-drenched awesomeness.
WHAT? Really? Seriously? You don't KNOW? Well, for those who prefer not to wikipedia after the equinox and/or have heretofore abstained by choice or by circumstance from one of the EIGHTEEN previous events, Wafflepalooza™ is, quite simply, a breakfast in the grand waffle tradition generously garnished with the spiritual feast that is General Conference, Sunday Morning Session.
Now, let's be clear, this is no stream-on-your-laptop-or
WHEN: Sunday, April 6th; 11am-ish to 2pm-ish
WHERE: The Rockville House (818 Crothers Lane, Rockville)
WHO: You, your friends, your roommates, your significant others, those odd little furry lemmings who always seem to follow you home from the metro every other Thursday unless it's the week before a national holiday, your neighbor's third cousin's body shop guy who gave you that sweet discount on the bling-encrusted grill you've been itching to incorporate into your after-market upgrades to "Mitch the Mighty [Geo] Metro," etc., etc., etc.
ATTIRE: Well, preferably some type of semi-full-coverage clothing, but feel no obligation to strangle yourself with a tie or pour your little booty into those control-top pantyhose unless the masochism helps you focus on the talks. You might consider something such as THIS as an appropriately festive alternative to your standard Sunday fashions.
WE PROVIDE: All-You-Can-Eat WAFFLES, Maple Syrup and Butter
YOU BRING: Supplemental Sustenance of the Sunrise Selection ...Options include but are not limited to eggs (can be cooked upon arrival), stuff to put in eggs (cheese, veggies, etc), sausage/bacon/ham, quiche, non-maple-syrup waffle toppings (fruit, ice cream, carmel sauce, whipped cream, hot fudge, maraschino cherries, etc.), juice, milk, fruit, crepes, etc.
DON'T BRING: Maple Syrup. See, the thing is, The Rockville House was actually built right on top of an ancient maple burial ground. As the mystical powers of the ancient maple tree spirits percolated through the layers of magic fairy dust liberally applied to the structural foundations of the house, the sugary, maple matter liquefied, creating an ever-flowing spring of syrup. Thus, offerings of maple syrup will simply be redundant offerings lacking in any appreciable increase to the culinary experience of those in attendance. Plus, infusion of non magical maple substances could potential anger the maple gods, and we all know what doom that could commence....Seriously, just bring orange juice or goosebury syrup or that semi-freezer burned bag of hash browns you've been meaning to get rid of since your last roommate got married 6 years ago and moved out.
METRO RIDES? by request and pre-registration only. Please contact the Waffle e-Hotline by hitting the "reply" button associated with this message.
DISCLAIMER: If you are in any way shape or form offended at any level by the irreverence of any statement included in this literary masterpiece, well, you probably aren't very much fun. So, you may not want to attend this event, and you will definitely want to make sure you never sit anywhere remotely close to being within earshot of its author or any member of the WCE board of directors during any sort of substantive and/or spiritual experience whatsoever.
Waffle Conference Extravaganza and Waffle Conference Extravaganza — East Coast Edition dba Wafflepalooza and the Wafflepalooza brand are registered trademarks and subsidiaries of the Waffle Conference National Network. This event is produced in conjunction with the 19th Semi-Annual Waffle Conference Extravaganza sponsored by the GonzoGroup Corporation headquartered in Springville, UT.
4 comments:
We had our Wafflepalooza early this year--a Friday night party with friends. My folks are staying with us this conference weekend, so I don't think we'll be in Springville Sunday morning, but hopefully we'll have waffles. I think part of the reason Adam & Eric have let it peter out is because they have no kitchen skills, and therefore can't be certain that Waffles will happen unless someone else is going to buy & prepare the food. Whereas you (Jenn) & David could always take care of that on your own. At least Wafflepalooza lives on in various incantations, right?
I'M DOING WAFFLES HERE IN ST. GEORGE! IT'S FREAKIN AWESOME! Wow... so it only lives on with those that move away... hmmm maybe the others should move out too! just a thought. ;D
We also had a small scale waffle-fest here this morning. Hal and Ann Wallentine joined us and now as I listen to Uchtdorf I find myself trying multiple pronunciations of that joyous word, Waffle:
Vaffle
Waffly
Vaffenhel
VonWafflemister
Waffle VonMapledorf
Lufwaffle
Ya, I das liken dos waffles.
*shakes head and regains composure*
Jenn and Tina, thanks for keeping the flame burning bright. Depending on our companions in October we may be willing to go down to Springtown and co-host Wafflemania. Hey, maybe you could both be there and all of my sibs over age 18 could bring a significant other (I won't hold my breath but I'll hope).
xoxoxo,
david
well, Dave, I can't make any sort of promises regarding a significant other... but, i just might be there in Oct.... working out the plans for the fall adventures....
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